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What if is a game for scholars
So it was sheer necessity
Nothing but chance that for reasons hidden to the world
Has led the two souls here
Made them equal like dog and owner
Annoyed but neutral spend the night
Sharing the same bed they did slumber
Beneath two blankets side by side (oh, please)
It makes no difference to explain
How it all came to this
'Cause what if is a game for scholars
Approve and seal it with a kiss
It makes no difference to explain
How it all came to this
'Cause what if is a game for scholars
Except and seal it with a kiss
Quickly erasing your lust
All we inspire is disgust
But then, of course, you can never be sure
And that's the ghost, that's haunting you
(Let me tell you about the love
It's not expensive?
Would you like to try it?)
Familiar causes made me shiver
Mainly with chill this foetus coiled
Apologies did only soothe his anger
But explainations could not avoid
Him winding down the ancient form
The spell of insecurity
That liturgy which cruelly pointed out
The difference between him and me
I can't be bothered to explain
How it all comes to this
Because all causes are familiar
Accept and seal it with a kiss
The larch and not the morning-cock
Beheld two spoons our cook had graced
And as our hero woke, he found
His left arm still around my waist
He rose, and I, the ugly child
Born of the shadow sphere
Allowed my thoughts to briefly travel
To a world to far from here
Where it's the cock that greets the morning
And piles have meanings unlike their faces here
But what if is a game for scholars now baby
So try your best now to hide the tears
He said, as he walked to the bathroom
I am not at all like you
Well I don't have the slightest idea
What you could possibly be referring to
But rest assure, man, because whatever
This most dreadful thing might be
Be sure that our difference is more than obvious
To the world outside and me
Quickly erasing your lust
All we inspire is disgust
But then, of course, you can never be sure
And that's the face, that's frightening you
I can't be bothered to explain
How it all comes to this
'Cause what if is a game for scholars
And it's called: Helvetia Sexualis
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